“I’ll bring her a big Toblerone.” “I brought you a big Toblerone.” “You don’t deserve this big Toblerone.” [Gigguk]: You know… out of context, this one clip may seem like it makes no sense but trust me: When you see this IN context it makes even less fucking sense. So in some crazy alternate universe, this one guy from some band decided he can make his own show about an anime world seen through the eyes of Jaden Smith. Starring Jaden Smith with big names like Jude Law, Susan Sarandon, Stephen Fry, and Steve Buscemi providing some supporting roles. Oh. Wait… that was… that was… that was this universe. This is what happens when a group of millennial students more lit than Snoop Dogg on 420 break into the Netflix offices and describe a random episode of anime to some Netflix executive and the executive decides to make an anime based on that description alone …and the executive is Jaden Smith. [Jaden Smith]: Unbelievable. Now this is the part of the video where I’m supposed to tell you about Neo Yokio, but um… um… [Kaz]: I don’t get it. How did you know the Helenas were gonna kill me? [Helena]: I had a dream that a Toblerone was in trouble and that Toblerone was you. [Gigguk]: Neo Yokio is a Netflix exclusive ani– anim– Uhh, excuse me… A[Burp]nime that showcases the life of Kaz. a walking, talking personification of Jaden Smith’s Twitter account. Starring Jaden Smith. Featuring Jaden Smith’s voice acting. “I’m not obsessed with clothes. I’m just an elegant man of taste.” It chronicles Kaz’s adventure in the 100% real anime city of San Fransokyo. Los Angelokyo. Neo Yokio. North Kakalaka. In the future independent weeaboo state of Japerica. I just made that up right now, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that was actually true. He exorcises demons, fights to become the number one bachelor, becomes a communist driver, and flies around on his mecha butler. Uh, what else? “A demon possessed my field hockey ball!” “Oh for fuck’s sake.” [Gigguk]: Wait? Is this really an anime? Nah, it’s gotta be an anime. Look! There’s Ranma. There’s Sailor Moon, who even knows anymore? I mean, what was that thing I said literally three videos ago? “If anime were to properly become mainstream in the future, I believe Netflix will have a major part to play.” *(crying)* (in horror) WE DID THIS! THIS IS WHAT WE WANTED! OH GOD, WHAT HAVE WE DONE?!?! I mean, hey, who’s this guy? Looks Japanese. Maybe he’s worked in anime before. Probably nothing I’ve ever heard of. Must be a nobody. Studio Deen? Production IG? Never heard of them. Do they make anime or something? Must be some small studio that has done nothing. *crying/laughing who knows* But to be fair, I think it was mostly animated by some Korean studio. I- I don’t know, there’s not much information about the production details of this. So you can just go ahead and take it down, r/Anime. Just- just take it down. We didn’t– we didn’t want this. Just give us Shelter, but Take this down, take you, take, take this, TAKE THIS DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!! I had a full-on existential crisis trying to figure out exactly just how this thing exists. I mean WHAT IS THIS SHOW?!?!? What IS it?! You have a production with the voice talents of Jude Law, Susan Sarandon, Steve Buscemi and Stephen Fry in something that may or may not be an anime And this is the way they mark their introduction to the medium. “WHAT IN THE NAME OF Shakespeare’s arse is GOING ON HERE?” That’s a very… very good question. First of all, let’s look at these character designs. They look like they were ripped from some kid’s middle school DeviantART project And the animation is not much better, looking like it came out of a mid-2000’s anime. …And I’m not sure if that’s an insult to mid-2000’s anime. Eureka 7 came out in mid 2000s, Full Metal Alchemist came out in mid 2000’s. Hell, I think even LoveHina had smoother animation than- But, you know, it’s not just about the aesthetics, which can be saved by equally good writing and plot. “What, do you live here?” “I wish I lived here.” “Me too.” *gigguk chuckling* The writing boils down to this: Can you appreciate the enlightened knowledge that can be found on Jaden Smith’s Twitter in such tweets as “how can mirrors be real? “How can mirrors be real… if our eyes aren’t real?” “You can discover everything you need to know by looking at your hands.” And… “Most trees… are blue” Well good, cuz this show plays out like scrolling through his Twitter feed. Nothing makes sense. Jude Law, why are you a mecha butler? Why do people care about who is number one bachelor? Did someone actually write an action in the scripts that reads: “Vapes menacingly” And hey, while we’re at it, why not tackle some hot topics like gender politics, capitalistic ideals and communism? “She seems like a bit of a nut.” “Have some sympathy, sir. She’s from the Soviet Union.” “It is a social phenomenon in Japan that has isolated up to a million young people. It’s known as hikikomori.” “I’m hikikomori now” Nah, I gotta say though… It’s really good to see Western creators also tackling real social issues that are prevalent abroad… “Hikikomori?” “Hikikomori.” “Full hikikomori??” “Hikikomori to the max.” (muffled) “Hikikomori.” “Hikikomori.”
“Hikikomori?!” And… I mean… the first step is always is just… using that word enough times so one day they’ll hopefully figure out what it means. This is not even mentioning the most gaudy in-your-face product placements that are just insulting for anyone watching it. So it’s really lucky that I have the cool refreshing taste of Heineken to get me through these troubling times. That wasn’t a dig at their product placement. I just really like beer. …because this show turns me into a raging alcoholic. I keep thinking that any moment I’ll wake up and realize that this was just some weird dream birth. Nope. I mean there’s…no, it’s uh… it’s It’s 6 episodes… yeah, it’s, it’s still on Netflix. It’s not a dream!!! If you’re going to watch it, I recommend watching it while intoxicated, but don’t worry if you can’t. Because after you watch it, you’ll walk out feeling intoxicated either way. This is the worst piece of garbage to ever come out And you should save yourself a few hours of your life by avoiding it like the plague. …Is what I would be saying, until about three episodes in I had an epiphany. Within this convoluted mess of a production, I was… having a good time. I was laughing. It was entertaining. It had the same rhythm, jump cuts, awkward delivery, and comedic timing you’d see in something akin of an abridged series. “How thoughtful.” ‘Honey, the snacks are ready.’ “Guys I gotta go. Snacks are ready.” And then it hit me. This is comedy genius. This is the final form of anime. It is an abridged series for an anime that only exists in Jaden Smith’s mind! Forget what I said about the Netflix executives. It’s Ezra Koenig waking up one day and thinking to himself: ‘You know what? I feel like making the most expensive meme that’s ever been made.’ It’s so absurdly over the top with perfect material That it’s just rife with the best and worst of meme culture today. All it’s missing is someone dabbing with a fidget spinner and a fedora and it’ll be complete. Wait. Hold on a second. [music in background] [ringtone] “Charles, who’s calling?”
“It’s Aunt Agatha, sir.” “Put her through. Audio only.” “I said audio only!!” *Gigguk dabbing with a fidget spinner and a fedora* This isn’t just bad animation. The animation complements the amateur comedic tone In the opposite way that Nichijou uses its animation for its absurd comedy It’s not bad animation at all, it’s… Sakuga! Jaden Smith isn’t just talking shit. He’s a philosopher way beyond our time and his wise words here should be listened to. Yes. It isn’t Neo Yokio, it’s Neo Wokio. When we think of iconic character tropes in anime, what do we see? Tsunderes, yanderes, kuuderes. But move out the way, boys, because now is the era of Toblerone-deres.You don’t deserve this dere. YOU DON’T DESERVE IT. Yes. This is the hottest new waifu of the season. Forget REM, forget fucking Megumin. How can they even hope to stand up to the chewy, milky, triangular sweetness of a Toblerone bar? No I don’t want to see just plain old chocolate bars any more. [interspersed with clapping] Posters, figurines, fucking edible dakimakuras. Come on J-LIST. Let’s get on that shit. Overall I give Neo Yokio nine dabs out of ten. Right up there with Ghost Stories, but just shy of The absolute masterpieces like the Bible Black dub and the magnum opus of them all: Garzey’s wings. “DAMN YOU YAMATO TAKERUNO MIKOTOAOAUUUUUUGH!!!!!” And I un-ironically hope that there will be a sequel. with Shia LaBeouf in it Uhhhhh Well that just happened. Hey guys, hope you enjoyed the video. Thank you very much this month to Robert Harnborg, Kmustlive, Basel, Lee Watts, Patrick Madsen, And everyone else on Patreon for helping support me for this month and making this video possible. Not many updates today, but I am back in Thailand now. And I’m thinking about doing a meet-up, for now penciled in the date of Saturday the 14th of October Just outside the Bangkok animates in the MBK center, at around 2 p.m. So if you’re in the Bangkok area, feel free to come say hi. I’ve also made a Facebook event in the description just in case any last-minute changes happen. Or so I can just get an idea of numbers because I really don’t know how many of you guys are in Bangkok. Anyway. That’s it from me. I’ve been Gigguk and I’ll see you all next time.