Help us, Ace Discovery! Save us
from the Neon-Nazis! SLAM PUNK! WOO! Haha, suckers!
You’re funny, Ace! You’re funny! Godammit, turn that **** off.
What? NOOO! Come on, man! It’s movie night! Movie
night! Movie night! Movie night and I let you pick again-
Yeeeaah! And you pick this.Again. Oh come on, man, this is great! you got the
lines! you got the chicks- I got a beaten old piece-of-**** space ship
and a retard shouting in my ear. Well… what do you wanna watch? Otherwise? …Robot Dirty Dancing?
AAAAAAAAWWWWWW… Oh come on, that’s classic cinema.
It’s a total robot flick! Hey… Hey — you want a good
Nobody puts robot baby in the corner. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWW… SUCKS! Cracker Jack, outside, now. Bring the captain. Suck it! Woah, Jet, what happened to the ship?!
We just crashed, captain. Didn’t you feel it? I’m drunk, Jet. I’m drunk. We hit an asteroid field. Our faithful service
droid stuck his dick in the autopilot. Man, she was askin’ for it!
It’ll take a while to fix. Drive fried, hull breached, fuel cells low. Fuel Cells! Sounds like a job for an adventurer, right Jack? The volcano Ace, there’s always fuel in a volcano!
Captain I really don’t think it’s wise… Ok, see you, Jet! So how d’you know so much about volcanos. I been reading the Space Adventurer’s Handbook.
When did you learn how to read? Last week, you know, you were in hyper-sleep.
I blacked out in the shower, Jack, let’s not sugar coat it.
Chapter 2, sub-section F states that every volcano contains at least one alien society
with one or more crystals of power. Oh yeah… Hey Ace, you want some?
Nope. Aren’t you gonna get your gun out, Ace? There could be monsters down here! You didn’t finish that chapter did you? Canyons have monsters, volcanoes always have
sexy chicks. Icebergs have dudes.
Greetings heroes. Thou hast journeyed long. Now, choose your reward… Here lies the galaxy crystal. The most powerful energy source in the universe. And here, our sensual boudoir Where we– We ain’t sticking our wieners in
any chicks made of fire. Right Jackie? Oh yeah. Yeah take it off. OH GOD
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Hold it right there ya god– Stab him in the mouth! Captain! You’re back! And with a-
Come on, we’re out of here. Mmhmm… Uhuh… Ok, that oughta
do it. Now you’re gonna have to keep
that surgical skirt on for two weeks. Do your best to avoid open flames, And if you’ve
gotta touch yourself, try to just touch your balls. Ok?
Looks like you skipped the chapter on extreme-temperature intercourse.
Yeah well… At least I saw some tits. Although I think looking at them might have given me
retina damage. Plus one of them stepped on my nads! You cock’s looking at me. Hangover!